- Never, under any circumstances,
take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
- If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why
the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve,
its full potential, that word would be "meetings."
- There is a very fine line between "hobby" and
"mental illness."
- People who want to share their religious views with
you almost never want you to share yours with them.
- You should not confuse your career with your life.
- Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up
and dance.
- Never lick a steak knife.
- The most destructive force in the universe is
gossip.
- You will never find anybody who can give you a clear
and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings
time.
- You should never say anything to a woman that even
remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless
you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that
moment.
- There comes a time when you should stop expecting
other people to make a big deal about your birthday.
That time is age eleven.
- The one thing that unites all human beings,
regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or
ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL
believe that we are above-average drivers.
- A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter,
is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay
attention. It never fails.)
- Your friends love you anyway.
Visdomsord
Av: Dave Barry